Crying

Ok. So I can't handle it anymore. I've watched this scene for about 5 times and I still cry every time. I mean, it's not just that I ship them, but the ending was too beautiful I cannot handle the feels. And they both died at the same place/time/bed and holding hands. HOW CAN SOMEONE NOT CRY OVER THAT?

When Dhia finds out she has cancer was already really upsetting. And Nora Danish did a good job at it. My tears are almost dry watching this show. When she died and he kissed het forehead- I CANNOT HELP BUT BREAKDOWN. Then he laid beside her and passed on as well.

I can't. I needed to let it out. I've never cried this bad over a show. It was a good one though. Adi and Nora did great jobs. I love them. I mean, look

Boys Don't Cry

I just read a book I picked from the library a few days ago.

I can't. Okay? OMG. Just wow.

So it's called Boys Don't Cry by Malorie Blackman. And I just absolutely love it. Isn't it just amazing how something - someone - so little could change so many lives? Okay, I get that life as Dante knows it is over the moment  Melanie steps in carrying that baby. I mean, it does suck. Like, he'd worked his ass off to get that 4 A-Stars for his A-Levels and planned all those getting a steady job so he could pay off his student loan and going to university with a girl he actually cares about. Like, it's all gone after the baby came.

Personally I don't like Melanie's decision. Like, why the drop the bomb on Dante like that?? And perfect timing really because on the same day he's waiting for his results. But his daughter, little Emma.. I feel like she's such a miracle. I mean, Dante didn't want her, called her 'it' most of the time BUT HELL AFTER THAT HE JUST WOULDN'T LET ANYONE "take my daughter away from me". Isn't that just adorable? And he's 17. And Emma just changed him. 

And I can relate not in the same case, but you know, I changed too. Whilst Dante's inspiration is Emma, mine is Drew Chadwick. As in, Dante and I see the world differently now. I mean, he didn't appreciate all the hard work parents had to go through but now he does. I feel like I was there with him while he brought Emma up. And now she can speak and walk a little bit. And she loved Uncle Adam. Even though now he doesn't look as good as he looked before. I swear I cried and laughed and then cry again. 

The book and the writing and the emotions. I can't.

I love how it taught me to never let one moment slip without telling the people you love that you love them. Dante's dad told him he was proud, and I cried. When Emma kissed Adam's scarred face, I cried. When Dante told Emma that "I love you, Emma. I love you very, very much," I cried. When Dante and Adam told each other that they love one another, I cried. When Emma puked all over Adam, I laughed. So I cried more than I laugh but there were other laughable moments as well. 

All in all, I just love this book. Really. And I wish Melanie don't come back ever so Dante could take care of Emma until he no longer can. I seriously imagined what would happen when she turns 5, and then 10, 15 and so on. I hope she would be grateful towards her father. I mean, I cried just thinking about what if she did not appreciate him? He gave up uni for her. I love you, Dante. You amazing 17 year-old responsible-guy-that-are-rare-in-the-world. 

I love that family. I really do. <3

DREW, THANK YOU.

OKAY. So firstly, Drew probably wouldn't even see this because you know, he's got like 7545678x mentions per second. But I'm gonna keep up hope anyway. So don't judge. <3

AND, Drew, you probably don't even have the time to read this but if you do I am SO thankful that you took a few minutes of your time to.

Ok. Hi. :) 

Where do I even begin? I saw just one sentence the other day on my old school book. It says: 'Write about someone who inspires you.' And know what? I instantly thought of you. It may not be that much of a deal, but when something you do actually changes a person's life, it's just really amazing. 

I don't regret but I don't like what I did for the past 17 years of my life. I judge, I hate and I don't accept who I really was. Whenever I see someone I dislike merely because she/he has something I don't, or that they just annoy me, I hate on them. And I judge. I judge most of the time. I hate the girls in my school because they're pretty. I hate a lot. And now, thinking back, I almost regret it because hating is not worth my time. But I don't regret it because it was my past and I accepted it. Mistakes. 

But before that I saw your audition with the guys. And I became an instant fan. I mean, you guys are so talented. But later on I created twitter and found your accounts and started following you. And in those times I know of you guys to have good personalities. And good hearts. And funny. And especially you, Drew, seriously, if I'm not wrong you started #TeamInspire. At first, I was just interested because I just wanted to get noticed by you. I made that fan art and you replied me. YOU REPLIED ME. I couldn't sleep that night and I wanted to scream but my neighbors would sue me. 20th Oct. Forever remembered. 

From then on, though, I realized that it wasn't just about getting noticed. I saw your retweets and all those inspiring words people sent to you. And I decided that I want to change. I want to be as awesome as you are. I want to be inspiring. I want to inspire people like you do. And every morning I tell myself that I'm a part of the team and I doodle #TeamInspire on my notebooks during free times at school because it kept me smiling and pushed me to be stronger. This may sound huge, but it helped me survive my everyday. 

I actually stopped hating without even realizing it. I don't judge anymore. I ignored the girls who once I hated before. I wasn't a better person when I hate on them. I just stopped with negativity. And sometimes, I get a really bad week, but on the Sunday it was sunny and my stepfather was smiling and my mom was, as always, looking so happy that I thought to myself, this week was just another hard time, I survived it, I can survive next week. And I tell myself that everyday. I've never felt any happier. 

I know I'm only 17, and if God lets, my future might still be a long way to go and I'm aware that there will so many obstacles waiting for me as I go forward and chase my dreams. I will try as best as I can to be strong and face any problems in my way. And I tell you today, that I am almost positively sure that one day, you'll see my name on a cover of a book. And from then, I will continue to inspire people. And I want to help them like you helped me. 

And OMG I'm wasting your time now, aren't I? I'm sorry. I just really wanted to thank you for what you do. I never really paid attention to anyone with the same intention as you do but I paid attention to you (because you know, you're attractive and all that you're not only attractive but inspiring too) and that one night I just really couldn't sleep and thought things through. And I'm sure it's not only me. There so many other fans that you've really inspired. On my timeline I see them posting all the inspirational words and we're all like; 'Don't hate. Remember what the boys taught us.' The boys meaning you and Wes and Keaton and Kenny and Kyle, obvi.

SO THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR CHANGING ME. And I hope you're healthy now. I'm praying for Wes, Keats, Kenny and Kyle and your health and luck. May you succeed one day.

And I imagined once telling my children about how awesome you guys were and I hope that generation still know you and make you their inspiration. Because, really, you truly, amazingly, inspire people.

There's something I wanted to say but now I forgot because rumor has it you and Paige are dating. Hahahaha. Okay, ignore that. LOVE YOU.

I remember now. I want to get a tattoo that says #TeamInspire or 'Drew Chadwick Inspires Me' but my parents would be pissed. So much they would actually disown me. I might get one though, after I'm 18. <3 And one day when I get a follow from you, I swear I will shout out to the world. Thank you.

Okay, I'll stop bugging you now. But I'm glad I got to let it all out and I really, really hope you would read this. I'm talking crap it's midnight and I'm soo sorry. KBye.

P.S: Did I mention that I fell in love with Gandhi because of you? 

You must be the change you wish to see in the world. - Mahatma Gandhi

Love, 

Your No.1 fan/ Rina (@DrewGandhi/@EmblematixSG)

Introducing

Okay. Let me take a minute to breathe first.

OMG. YOU GUYS.

So I started watching XFactor the other day and I saw these guys~~~

So they're called Emblem3, the band consisting of Drew Chadwick, Wesley Stromberg, Keaton Stromberg, Kenny and Kyle Miner. At first when I saw them on TV, I was like; 'Okay, these guys have nice arms.' And then they got onstage and started singing and I just - EXPLODED. 

Okay, so first, they have amazing voices. Like, really amazing. And second, they actually wrote their own songs. Talk about pure originality. And they're hot, good-looking guys. Seriously, though, they have the whole package. And I don't care if they don't win XFactor. DID YOU GUYS KNOW THEY'RE ALREADY SO FAMOUS?!?! I'm sure they'll be huge. Bigger than anything. 

Honestly, I'm just speechless about these guys. They're awesome. Enough said. 

Insanity Strikes

Time's Ticking

Really, really fast. Like, earlier in the library, I checked in @ 10.35 and sat down to write and realized that five minutes past. Like, what?

So is it perfectly normal that I'm feeling a little slack two weeks into finals? I should be panicking, and a part of me is, but the other part of me felt like we're already free. Ugh. Not a good sign. 

I watched X-Factor earlier and saw Drew from Emblem 3 wearing shades. I'm a sucker for guys who wears shades and leather jackets. Like, they get so hot with sunglasses and those leather jacket. But when they're without them, some ordinary guy would be just that. Ordinary. But don't get me started on Robert Pattinson. 

Oh. My. God. 

I just watched Cosmopolis and turns out it was just like Bel Ami, only it's modern day. Some scenes I do not wish to watch twice. And I skipped a lot of scenes from the movie. I felt violated, even though RPattz was like, so hot. I don't understand the plot, because of my skipping habbits. But whatever, right? There was this scene where he shot his hand and it looked real and he looked like he was really in pain, with veins popping out on his forehead and stuff. Well, not literally, but yeah. 

I had like, two dreams of being SO close to Robert Pattinson of which a) I was kissing the corner of his lips, and running my fingers through his oh-so-soft hair and he looked so pained with all the bruises on his face and b) Rob was a prince and I had to marry him while my boyfriend was actually Edward Cullen. INSANE. But there was that part of the dream when I was on the bed with Rob, just sitting and talking and I started saying that I'm grateful for his support for my college and life, etc, and then I started crying and telling him that I'm not happy. Which felt like a lie. He. Pulled. Me. Into. His. Arms. He pulled me into his arms and I was bawling like a baby all over his shirt and he was telling me that I will be happy, that he was going to make me happy.

I fell in love with him all over again. *Dreamy sigh*

Dreams are as good as any. Since my chances of meeting him are slim to none. 

LOOK AT THIS MAN! 

When 8 November is up, and I'm free - OH YES I'LL BE FREE - I am going to be staring at his face and his eyes and his lips and SWOON. For every second. 

OH MY GOD

Oh my God.

Just- I can't believe this.

So for this week of holiday I totally had a fangirl fit all over Edward Cullen. The free time actually let me stare at his picture and just, drool. And even cry. He is downright gorgeous. I don't see why my sister don't agree. I mean, he is handsome. The handsomest fictional character, like ever.

Maybe she's just too in love with Logan Lerman, who is really not that handsome, more at the adorable side, if I may say. Ugh. 

LOOK AT HIM! Just take a moment and focus. You'll fall in love.

Sadly, Edward Cullen belonged to Bella. -.- But not in my world, or any of my books they aren't.

End of.

Review On Arise - And Joshua Mayhew

Here's the second book to the Hereafter Trilogy...

You cannot believe how awesome it is. 

First off, the best thing about this book is that, it's no love triangle. Joshua is in love with Amelia, and she with him. The only problem is that, she's a ghost. He's a Seer, and having triggered the near-death experience, he could see her clearly. She'd saved him from drowning in the same river she had (due to an evil ghost Eli's doing). Sure they can touch. There's always that spark, tingling sensation whenever the living skin and the dead skin made contact. Of course they weren't really happy, because Amelia cannot kiss Joshua for more than ten minutes before she'd disappear, a regular thing that happens even Joshua understood. 

In this second book, though, Eli came back to warn Amelia about the demons that wanted her. He also said about what the demons would do until she chooses them, that means hurting the people she cares about. Which means Joshua and the Mayhews. Thinking this, Amelia ran. Of course it's more complicated than that. You'd have to read it to know. I suggest you do. 

But OMG. It's awesome. I just love how when Josh's all nervous, he's run his fingers through his hair before resting them at the nape of his neck. It's so cute. And his midnight blue eyes. Can you imagine that? CAN YOU?!?! I bet not. Oh, Joshua Mayhew.. Be mine. 

Seriously, though. I can't wait for the third book, Elegy, which sadly will be out next year. That's too long, but I'll wait. Just like I'll wait for Amy Plum's If I Should Die. 

By the way, this Saturday. I am -so- going to get this book ~ Darkness Before Dawn.

Ta-Da!!! 

I cannot wait for it. Saturday. I will get you, Victor. I will. And you, too, Dawn Montgomery. I effing will.

SO MANY MORE BOOKS TO READ!!

I can't. There's too many and I want them ALL.

So I just recently followed this reader's blog that was all about YA Fictions. Oh my God. Look at the list of the books they have!! Like, wow. Can I have all of them? I really want to read these books. They're just so amazingly good, and they pull me in like completely. I'm wanting to read Destiny by Laura DeLuca and Darkness Before Dawn by J.A London. 

One of the things I really love about reading is that I can go along with the adventure and kind of experience all of those shit (and also many of those 'oh my Gosh' moments where the guys are being oh so romantic) that the characters are going through. I can cry, laugh, get angry and be pissed off along with them. And to me it's a good way for me to let everything out. Although most of the time after I finished reading a book or a series, I usually cry more than smile. It was usually when everything sets on me that reality sinks. Those are just fictions. And my emotions go to the people and characters in that particular book.

Plus, I love reading because I get to imagine scenes of Miley C and Edward (OMG, right?) that can never be possible in real life. Most of the time I have Miley as the FC (face-claim) female lead and Edward for the male lead. And whenever they described a character as buff, tough, sexy, I pictured Kellan Lutz (totally drool-worthy) and goofy and cute goes to Douglas Booth or sometimes Andrew Garfield. Blonde bitch always goes to blonde Nikki Reed. And female geeks normally for Demi and Selena or some others. I like to imagine when I read a story, or else I won't be able to understand at all. 

Imagining Edward and Miley totally helped me understanding the story line. And I love them together sometimes I wish Miley and RPattz could like meet and fall in love or at least work in a movie together. Miley once thought RPattz was cute. So that was something, wasn't it?

My heart broke with RPattz's after Kristen kinda cheated on him. So he loves that girl; rumor has it that he was gonna propose by the end of summer. No offence, if RPattz was to choose to take her back or let her go? I think he should just let her go. I mean, who knows she might do it again? I hope she won't. I hope this taught her a lesson. She is young after all. People make mistakes, don't we? Especially when we're younger and not that experienced in life. I don't 100% blame Kristen. Not really.

Besides, I am happy for Miley on her engagement with Liam. I mean, congrats. 

But I also can't help that I fantasize Miley and Rob together, right? It's not like I can do anything. I'm a girl from Singapore and I have this very thin chance of meeting either of them at all. But I do hope I get to one day. It'll be one of my goals/missions accomplished. 

Anyway. I know it's only 8pm. But I have to go. And I'll be gone for a few days til I get my internet back. And I'll be reading The Savage Grace later on. 

Ciao. With love. Xoxo. 

CrazyFangirl

My Storyline

My Two-Year Old Storyline..

To me this is totally cool, really.

So I've had this on-going story-line in mind for almost two years now. Imagining Edward Cullen (I prefer the pale and clean-shaven RPattz) as Lord Vengeance, creator of all the Greek Gods and Goddesses (Cool, right? I know.) And then there's Miley Cyrus, playing Goddess Of Love Aphrodite. Now these two fell in love but their relationship was forbidden due to whatever rule Lord V had set up for his creations before he created them. It was against it, their relationship. So, keeping his pride, Lord V fled. Like, totally ran away from all of them and hid in his realm. 

Of course he realised he couldn't go a day without her. So, thinking that he could be with her in another life, Lord V sort of put a spell (or something) on them. She kept dying at age twenty-one, though, after being reincarnated over and over. But I'm making them soulmates. He really loves her, and she does him, only she thought she doesn't. Life after life, he searched for her. Sometimes too late, sometimes too early. At some point during the 1700s, (he adopted a permanent name Edward), he was almost regretting the fact that they sort of cursed like this. Almost. But he thought it was worth it. But sometimes it just hurt too much because in some lives, Miley already found someone else; someone she thought she loves, which she does but not as much as she does Edward. 

Edward, though, wasn't much of a good-doer. He has a lot of female companions (of course; he's that gorgeous) and at some points of his lives, he'd fall in love with other reincarnated Goddesses, but they would always remind him of his love for Aphrodite, which sent him searching all over again. In 2008, modern day already, Edward as the vampire born in 1901, had been searching for her over a hundred years. He finally found her that year. Famous Disney star; and like always, love at first sight.

Whoa.. Wait. Should I be plotting this and writing it for my first ever book?

OMG. Why did I never think of this?! 

Ciao. Xoxo.

Uncontrollable Emotions

I REALLY CAN'T..

I can't control my emotions. 

Firstly, let me just say I love Until I Die by Amy Plum. I love absolutely everything about it. Almost every one of Kate and Vincent scenes get me turning into a 'gooey mess'. I love these two put together. It's the perfect imperfection. Although I'm actually quite upset that Until I Die ended with the suspicion that Vincent may be dead, I'm hoping he really didn't. And I'm waiting for the rumored last book called If I Should Die. Which will be out next May. That seems like forever away. Anyways, I'd very much like to congratulate Amy Plum for such a good series.

Not only Amy Plum, though. Lauren Kate did a really good job for The Fallen Books series. I've been waiting for the last installment since last year and I finally managed to read it. RAPTURE was amazing; beautifully written, expressed with such emotions that I really can feel. While I love that Daniel and Luce finally manage to be happy together without Luce having to die over and over again, I don't like that they gave up all the memories of hardship, their angel friends, and being ANGELS themselves, for LOVE. But it was at the same time really amazing. It got me to tears too.

I'm now reading the last book for The Dark Divine trilogy. I hope this time the characters, Daniel Kalbi and Grace Divine, get to have a similar happy ending like Daniel and Lucinda get in Rapture. The Savage Grace has a good book cover, and I hope it won't disappoint me. Daniel Kalbi is recently stuck in his white wolf form because he saved Gracie's life. And he has to turn back, right? He has to.

For the past week, I've read good books. Namely, The Thing About The Truth by Lauren Barnholdt. It's good. Taught me that truth will always find its way out. I've also read Sarah Dessen's What Happened To Goodbye, and Lock & Key. Her books are always relatable. And I love every one of her books, except maybe That Summer, my least favorite.

So far, all the books I've read did not disappoint. Except, of course, for the Soul Screamers series. After for like, 4 or 5 books being in love with Nash, the female lead (forgot her name. Was it Kaylee? I think.) lastly fell for Nash's brother Tod instead. That pissed me off real bad because Tod had been my least favorite character of all the books I've ever read. There are always some background characters that I love. Like Jules and Ambrose from Until I Die. Or Talbot and April from The Dark Divine.

I hate Tod. Period.

Plus, I read the ninth book of The House Of Night series called Destined. I fell in love with Aphrodite Lafont all over again. I pictured blonde Nikki Reed playing her. Perfection. I'm waiting for the tenth book (hopefully the last). And I also finally caught up with Hush Hush's third book Silence. Patch and Nora. Nora and Patch. Epic. I'm waiting (always waiting) for the final installment which will be named Finale and launched probably this October.

Can't wait!! More books please.

P.S: I'm gonna read the sequel to Haven (I've searched for this book for weeks) and am I glad I found it? Hell yes I am. It's called Mirage. I hope Aidan and Violet stays together. And I'm guessing there'll be a third book. Hopefully.

Enough for now then. Until next time.

xoxo.